Of Hearts and Minds

I was always told, “Choose your words wisely.” I think the reason my parents instilled this in me is that, well, too many words confuse most people. It’s easy to hear people, but it’s entirely different to listen to them.

We need to remember that words may require more than just our hearing — listen. Listen for the reason behind the words. Besides, everyone has different communication needs and styles. We have come to a point where we take simple communication for granted, and as a result, people skills are suffering. When in a friendship, companionship, or any relationship, we should find a way of communicating that works for both parties.

Even when it’s uncomfortable or difficult, we should communicate how we feel. Effective communication can help stop the needless arguments that often occur. Those annoying little “straws” can pile up and break the back of what once seemed so strong.

To consistently be able to tell someone what’s on your mind, without arguing and with a willingness to compromise, is essential in creating a place of comfort and growth in your relationships and within yourself. One of the best ways to heal is simply purging the issues and irks so as not to end up living bitterly in a lonely existence. No one wants that.

Half of a great partnership is how you treat someone, so be kind. The other half is having the desire and ability to help the other person understand your needs, so speak your mind. Through the years, I’ve learned to live and let live a little bit more than I was able to half a lifetime ago.

When we focus on mutual understanding through open and honest communication, we can concentrate on the changes that need to be made. If we spend less time placing blame on who caused problems and more time working together to solve them, then we can really progress in our relationships.

“Two people communicating together on a journey as a couple manage their combined ‘baggage’ much more efficiently and effectively.” -Unknown

Most of us have heard, “You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar,” shield yourself with a smile, keep tenderness in your eyes and actions, and stay true. Be open, honest, and vulnerable. Communicate your heart’s desires. The heart is where we find our love, and from there, love can grow.