We have all been there.
At some point in our life, someone got their feelings bent over something you accidentally did. Let that sink in — it wasn’t in your design. Sometimes, we find opportunities to help others and accidentally make things worse. For instance, rushing to open a door for someone who has their arms full and unknowingly sliding a wrinkle in the doormat, causing them to stumble. Other examples may include pushing in a chair for someone as they sit down and having one of the chair legs break; tossing them their keys and seeing those keys fall straight into the sewer drain; or sliding them their beverage and watching it all go into slow motion when the cup bumps against their plate as a wave of sweet tea washes their dinner into their lap.
A favorite example of mine (not that those cited above were complete fiction) is a time my friend Roy asked for a tool while we were fishing from a canoe one warm, late winter afternoon. Since everyone knows, or soon will, it’s not wise to stand up in a canoe. “Sure. Here, catch!” I said, lofting the item. As my weight shifted the craft away from the now airborne object, Roy countered with kinetic energy of his own toward the tool, further pushing the canoe completely out from under us. There was no cartoon moment of eye contact before the Roadrunner and Coyote fell of the cliff. The two of us, and everything in that canoe, were suddenly, inextricably, over our heads in very cold water. This was certainly not my intention, but it was now our situation.
Some may judge me for my decision to not consider every possible action/reaction for how I chose to help in that moment. One may consider I could’ve crawled over, dangled it from a line, or slid it across the bottom. I could have placed the item on the paddle and delivered it like a pizza coming out of the oven; which is the new standard of shuttling tackle, tools, and beverages across a canoe’s middle. My good friend Roy wasn’t angry in the least, as the drama that ensued was not ever intended to occur. As we warmed ourselves by a hastily built fire, there was no fault finding, and lessons were learned.
When it comes to considering what we, having the benefit of not being in the panic of the moment, might have done differently in a situation, and if we choose to judge, remember that intent often should outweigh actions. By grand design, the problem arises when we are not privy to the intent of others, and that, my friend, is something worth considering. I know a couple of fishermen of big bass and good deeds who have learned better than to cast anything but lures from within a canoe, especially a glass one.
to your business!